Wednesday, October 17, 2007

blah

I hope that wherever he is, whatever he is doing right now, I hope "Chris" is okay. I was at the mall tonight. It was the first time I was there on my own, without him. It felt awful and empty. But now I am "reprogramming" as a co-worker calls it - remaking all of my LA memories and turning them into something of my very own, ones that do not include boyfriends but good friends and just myself.

Hope he is ok.

1 comment:

ET said...

Hey Jo.

He's fine. He'll be ok. He's a human being, he'll adjust, he's adaptable, he's moving on, just like you....

You're going to be fine. It's okay for you to hurt. It's okay for you to remember. It's okay for your memories to feel raw,

It's even okay for you to weep.

But it's not okay for you to feel sorry for yourself. Stop that. The past is done. Learn from it, grow, strengthen. It's fertilizer.

Stop a moment, close your eyes, breathe, enjoy the feeling of air in your lungs, imagine the deep, goose bumps on your arms, find some sunlight and feel it on your skin. It's warm, isn't it?

You're young, healthy, curious, eager?

You're alive, aren't you?

Me too.

Life is waiting.